Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?
by Naomi the Fire Adept
Summary: *Naomi* Have you ever seen the show 'Who's Line is it Anyway?' Bwahaha! *ahem* This is my parody of it.
1. Episode 1

Can you guess what this will be about?  
  
Garet: Pointless things that no one cares about?  
  
That's right!  
  
Garet: No, it's not. It's sick and wrong.  
  
Okey day then...  
  
***  
  
Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?  
  
Isaac: Hello and welcome to "Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?" the show where everyone's insane and the points don't matter. That's right, the points are just like how much hair gel Garet uses after the first dozen bottles.  
  
Garet: Why you are talking about my hair gel when you use twice as much?  
  
Isaac: Shut up. You, of all people, should understand how hard it is to make your hair defy the laws of gravity.  
  
Garet: That's my point!  
  
Isaac: Moving on...our guests today are Garet the idiot, Jenna the impossible, Picard the...um...Picard, and Ivan the pointless.  
  
Jenna: The impossible? I'll show you impossible, Isaac!  
  
Picard: I don't get a title thingy?  
  
Garet: A title thingy? You don't even deserve a title thingy after calling it that. Oh, wait...didn't I just...? Nevermind! I was just thinking and that never lasts long.  
  
Ivan: I'm pointless? What does he mean by that?  
  
Jenna: It's so obvious, Ivan. Sheba can do a much better job as a Jupiter Adept, so if she were to take your part in the first game, not to mention second, no one would care.  
  
Ivan: What about all of those fans out there that love me?  
  
Garet: I can count them on my hands. One...two...three...oh, wait...I don't remember what comes after three. Let's see...three...three...three...  
  
Picard: Isaac, you really stink at this game show host job. Even Felix could do it better, and that's saying something.  
  
Jenna: That was my line!  
  
Picard: Oh...um...sorry.  
  
Isaac: Moving on...our first game today is...Switching Hats!  
  
Picard: I have never heard of that game before, and I'm older than all of you combined.  
  
Garet: Ah ha! A clue to your age! Let's see...Jenna and Isaac are seventeen, Ivan is fifteen, and...um...my mom says that I have to attention span of a three year old, so I'll use that...which adds up too...adds up too...adds up too...  
  
Jenna: Can you just move on, Isaac? I don't want to have to sit next to this idiot for longer than I have to.  
  
Ivan: Why don't I have a point?!  
  
Garet: I could help you with that. All we need is a lot of hair gel and we can get your hair to stand up into a very sharp point. It worked for Isaac.  
  
Ivan: Good idea. Let's try it!  
  
Garet: Good...idea...I've never heard those words in the same sentence before if it was concerning something I said. Wow.  
  
Isaac: So...Switching Hats is a game where everybody gets a hat...and then they switch them!  
  
*silence*  
  
Isaac: ...  
  
*silence*  
  
Jenna: ...  
  
*more silence*  
  
All: ...  
  
*even more silence*  
  
Garet: What are we waiting for?  
  
Isaac: It would seem that our sound effects crew forgot how to PUSH THE DANG LAUGH TRACK BUTTON!!!  
  
Alex: Wha? Oh, you mean that big red one?  
  
Isaac: Yes!  
  
Alex: Sorry, man. Felix tipped over his coffee and then it went, like, ka-bang.  
  
Picard: I can't tell if he's trying to sound like a surfer or a stoner.  
  
Garet: There's a difference?  
  
Isaac: All right, then. Now that we are without sound effects, we'll have to play that game instead.  
  
Jenna: Sound Effects? That sounds like the stupidest game ever. There is no way in Wayward that you're getting me to play that game.   
  
Isaac: That's good, because Picard and Ivan will be playing it.  
  
Garet: There is no point to a game unless I'm in it. It has even less of a point if Ivan is in it.  
  
Ivan: *sobbing* I'm pointless...WAHHH!!!  
  
Picard: *amazed* He can cry more than a Mercury Adept. Now, that, is an achievement.  
  
Garet: *blink*  
  
Jenna: *blink*  
  
Isaac: *blink*  
  
Ivan: *sob*  
  
Garet: That wasn't funny.  
  
Isaac: Agreed.  
  
Garet: It's about time you started agreeing with me, Isaac!  
  
Isaac: Wow...déjà vu.  
  
Picard: Um...sorry. Weren't we going to play a game?  
  
Isaac: Yes! And now to play Sound Effects!  
  
Mia: Sorry, Isaac, we're out of time. We're about to roll the credits. Do you guys want to do a dance or something?  
  
Isaac: Um...sure. What kind of dance?  
  
Mia: *shrug* Sorry, I'm not a choreographer. Just do something.  
  
Garet: Oh! I know! I'll twirl around five times and then I'll burn whatever I stop in front of! That always gets a laugh!  
  
Mia: Actually, it won't. The laugh track is broken, remember?  
  
Garet: How does that make a difference...hey! Oh, wait...I lost my train of thought again.  
  
Jenna: Just do it already!  
  
Garet: *twirls around five times and stops in front of Ivan* Hey, pointless boy. Looks like you won't be making an appearance on the next show.  
  
Ivan: Oh...crap...  
  
Garet: Burn! BURN! BURRRRRRRRRRRRN!  
  
Ivan: *well done*  
  
Isaac: And that's our show! Goodnight everybody!  
  
Mia: Um...Isaac...this show is filmed at 8 in the morning.  
  
Isaac: Goodnight everybody!  
  
Mia: Right...  
  
***  
  
Garet: That was...interesting  
  
Indeed! Review! 


	2. Episode 2

GuseBat, I'm sorry that there shall be no penguins in this chapter.  
  
Garet: *looking pathetic* No penguins?  
  
I'm quite sad that I didn't include penguins, though. If I had, I would've gotten a cookie.  
  
Garet: *looking really pathetic* No cookies?  
  
*Pats Garet on the head* It's alright. I've got tons of candy left over from Girl's Camp.  
  
Garet: *brightens considerably* Food?!  
  
I'll even let you have my Big Hunk, cuz I can't eat them with my braces.  
  
Garet: But you don't follow the other rules about what you can't eat with braces. Why follow this one when it wrenches your heart to do so?  
  
You just wont understand until you get braces, too.  
  
Garet: Right...can we just get the story over with, now?  
  
Sure thing!  
  
***  
  
Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?  
  
Felix: Alright! Isaac stunk so much at being the host, that I get the job!  
  
Mia: You know you're pathetic when you're second to Isaac.  
  
Isaac: Hey! I don't think that Mudshippers out there appreciate that comment, Naomi!  
  
Mia: I don't appreciate you speaking at all. This is why I play Golden Sun 1, where your only comment is "!!!"  
  
Naomi: * Standing back stage by her laptop, trying to look innocent. *  
  
Felix: Hey! No talking! This is my show!  
  
Mia: Just go. In five...four...three...two...*mouths the word 'one'*   
  
Felix: Hello and welcome to "Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?" the show where everyone's insane and the points don't matter. That's right, the points are just like how much Kraden knows. *pauses for laugh track (which actually works this time) to finish* On tonight's show, we have Garet the brave, Picard the charmer, Jenna the most appreciated person in the world, and Sheba the feminist!  
  
Picard: ...I didn't know you thought of me that way, Felix.  
  
Felix: Wha?! I didn't write that title! I didn't write Garet's either.  
  
Jenna: Who did, then?  
  
Orchid and Naomi: *hiding behind a desk, cackling evilly as they write things on Naomi's laptop*  
  
Felix: Anyway...today, we'll start with a game called Weird Random Couple's Song, which will be played by Picard and Jenna. In this song, they will be expressing their "true love" for each other.  
  
Picard and Jenna: *blink* ...Eww! That's gross!  
  
Felix: That's right, it is. And Picard, if you touch her...*grasps his glass of water and squeezes until it breaks*  
  
Picard: Point taken.  
  
Felix: Good. And now, for Picard and Jenna's Weird Random Couple's Song! Does anyone have a suggestion for the style?  
  
Jenna: Rock!  
  
Picard: Um...classical?  
  
Mia: Opera!  
  
Felix: Opera style it is, then!  
  
* Picard and Jenna take their places on the stage. Picard looks more than a bit frightened and Jenna is glaring angrily at the world. *  
  
Picard: *whispering* I just remembered that I don't know how to sing.  
  
Jenna: *stands on his foot* You better know how to sing. If you don't know how to sing, I'll have to sing by myself. Now sing, dang it!  
  
Picard: *singing a off-key kind of opera* Oh, Jenna! I bet no one has ever considered us a couple before!  
  
Jenna: *also singing opera, but doing a considerably better job than Picard* At least not in the fics I've read! "Why not?" I ask.  
  
Picard: *still singing* I don't know! We are the best couple I've ever heard of!  
  
Jenna: We are?  
  
Picard: Jenna, you're supposed to sing!  
  
Jenna: Fine. *singing* I never knew you felt that way before.  
  
Picard: *singing, unfortunately* No, I really don't! I'm just saying that for the song!  
  
Jenna: *singing...my, that's getting boring to say* Don't you think I make any couple perfect?  
  
Picard: *still singing* No!  
  
Jenna: WHAT!!! Felix!  
  
Felix: Oh, Picard, you are dead! No one insults my little sis!  
  
Picard: Oh, crap.  
  
Mia: Guys, we can't have any violence!  
  
Felix: *Holding his fist inches from Picards face* Why not?  
  
Mia: It takes to much time away from the games that we're supposed to be doing.  
  
Felix: Too bad. *Proceeds to beat everyone's favorite Lemarian to a bloody pulp*  
  
Sheba: When am I going to get some lines?  
  
Garet: Me too! I'm tried of being quiet!  
  
Jenna: Not yet. Watching my older brother bet on Picard is too much fun.  
  
Felix: *holding Picard in an headlock and giving him a noogie* Say "my name is Piers!"  
  
Picard: No! Never!  
  
Felix: Say it!  
  
Picard: No! Stop messing up my hair!  
  
Felix: Say it or die!  
  
Picard: I refuse!  
  
Felix: Say it or I'll put you in water filled with rubber duckies!  
  
Picard: 0_0 NOOOOO!!! Not the rubber duckies!  
  
Felix: Then say it!  
  
Picard: *sob* My name is Piers.  
  
Felix: Bwahahaha!!!  
  
Sheba: That wasn't very nice. You know that Picard has a mortal fear of rubber duckies.  
  
Mia: o_O How did that come to pass?  
  
Jenna: *trying to look innocent* It wasn't my fault.  
  
Garet: *shouting* WHEN AM I GETTING SOME LINES?  
  
Felix: Any second now. The next game is Random Words, and everyone gets to play that.  
  
Garet: Yes!  
  
Sheba: Has anyone, besides me, noticed that these games aren't fun?  
  
Mia: Shut up! We can have people realize that!  
  
Sheba: Fine than. So how do we play Random Words?  
  
Felix: Everyone says random words that having nothing to do with what the last person said.  
  
Sheba: That sounds boring.  
  
Felix: It is! Now, you start, Garet.  
  
Garet: Okay! Food!  
  
Sheba: Wind.  
  
Picard: ...Duckies...  
  
Jenna: Burning.  
  
Garet: Food!  
  
Sheba: Wind.  
  
Picard: ...Duckies...  
  
Jenna: Burning.  
  
Garet: Food!  
  
Sheba: Wind.  
  
Picard: ...Duckies...  
  
Jenna: Burning.  
  
Felix: *rings his little bell thing* Alright, that's all for now, because obviously our contestants have one-track minds. Goodnight, everybody!  
  
Garet: Food!  
  
***  
  
Sorry again about the lack of penguins, GuseBat. I'll put some in the next chapter, I promise.  
  
Garet: Good thing. I don't care. 


	3. Episode 3

Are you ready to rumble?!!!!  
  
Garet: Did you go to a hockey game again?  
  
You know, I don't think they've said that at any of the hockey games I've been to.  
  
Garet: Okay...  
  
GO GRIZZLES! SMASH 'EM!  
  
Garet: Your dad has the weirdest ideas for Daddy/Daughter time.  
  
You know it!  
  
***   
  
Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?  
  
Felix: Hello and welcome to "Who's Psyenergy is it Anyway?" the show where everyone is insane and the points don't matter. That's right, the points are just like Ivan and Hsu! They just don't matter.  
  
Ivan: *now fully recovered from Garet's pyroness in the first chapter* FBM! Felix is being mean to me!  
  
FBM: Felix! You're dead!  
  
Felix: I feel so threatened. There are, like, three of you and I'm a level who-knows-what Venus Adept. What can you do that would scare me?  
  
Jenna: Besides, you have a stupid name. Fans of a Blond Midget? What group of idiots would worship a blond midget?  
  
FBM: Us!  
  
Jenna: *smacks her forehead* I see that.  
  
Mia: Alright, FBM, you have to go away so that Naomi can get on with this fic.  
  
FBM: Where is Naomi? We will destroy her! She makes fun of Ivan!  
  
Jenna: You must ask yourselves, who doesn't make fun of Ivan?  
  
FBM: Us!  
  
Garet: I find your very existence hilarious.  
  
FBM: Ivan ROCKS!!! Destroy Naomi!  
  
Naomi: *hiding on desert island as she uploads stories onto Fanfiction.net* Ho-hum...  
  
Felix: Okay, getting back to the game. On tonight's show, we have Garet-cow, Jenna-horse, Sheba-bee, and Picard-dog!  
  
Garet-cow: Moo...why is Naomi incorporating a pointless fic that was never posted so no one knows about it into this fic?  
  
Sheba-bee: Because she doesn't have anything better to do. I think it's really stupid since no one but Naomi, and most possibly Orchid, will get a laugh out of it. I hope Naomi is prepared to get thoroughly flamed for that. I should say, though, that Felix should be an animal, too, if we have to be.  
  
Naomi: On it! Let's all welcome Felix-frog!  
  
Felix-frog: Rib-bit. All righty, then. For our first game we have a special guest joining us.  
  
The Evil Penguin from Wallace and Grommet: *blink* *blink*  
  
Jenna-horse: Ack! That evil creature! Get it out of here!  
  
TEPfWaG: *blink* *blink*  
  
Picard-dog: What idiotic game could we be playing with an evil penguin?  
  
Mia: That's not everybody who's coming, though!  
  
Felix-frog: Wha?  
  
Garet-cow: Uh-oh...  
  
The Two Penguins from Golden Sun 2 that were so Sadly Apart: *burst through the doors holding hands...er...fins? Wings? What would you call them, anyway?*  
  
Garet-cow: Wow! Penguins! Naomi gets a cookie now!  
  
Naomi: *munches happily on a cookie* Nummy!  
  
Felix-frog: Just be glad that there aren't anymore penguins...  
  
Mia: Well...erm...you need to read the script better.  
  
Felix-frog: There's a script? I thought this show was supposed to be improv!  
  
Picard-dog: *squinting at his script* No--thing--is--im...provised?--anymore...Felix...frog? What sort of a line is that?  
  
Sheba-bee: Aren't we supposed to be playing a game?  
  
Jenna-horse: All of our games are really boring, though. Why would you want to play one?  
  
Sheba-bee: Because we have nothing better to do.  
  
Garet-cow: What about more penguins?  
  
*The doors burst open again and Alex rushes in*  
  
Alex: Penguins! Penguiiiiiiiiiiins in the dungeon! Thought you'd like to know. *faints on the spot*  
  
Jenna-horse: Someone felt like making fun of Harry Potter.  
  
Naomi: *attempts to look innocent*  
  
Garet-cow: We have a dungeon?  
  
*There is a loud sound quite similar to thunder and hundreds of penguins rush in, trampling Alex*  
  
Felix-frog: Oh, good fun! No more Alex!  
  
Mia: We're running out of time, guys. Can we do something with a point?  
  
Isaac: *appears randomly* Naomi is the coolest fiend in the world, therefore she can write stories without a point if she wants.  
  
Sheba-bee: Someone was paid to say that line.  
  
Isaac: *shrugs* Naomi pays better than Garet. She pays on time, too. *glares at Garet*  
  
Garet-cow: *attempts to look innocent but fails miserably* I would pay on time, but my sister steals my money for shopping sprees.  
  
Garet's sister: *appears just as randomly as Isaac* Shut up, Garet. *smacks Garet-cow upside the head* Take that.  
  
Garet-cow: MOOOO!!!  
  
Isaac: I just realized that cows are female. Garet's a girl! Bwahaha!  
  
Garet-cow: *miraculously grows horns in five seconds* MOOOO! *stabs at Isaac with his miracle horns*  
  
Isaac: *dodges by a few inches* Ah! Mia, tell him that you don't allow violence on this show!  
  
Felix-frog: Oh, please don't! This is too much fun.  
  
Mia: Agreed.  
  
Jenna-horse: I'm not going to point out the fact that we didn't even attempt to play any games today.  
  
Sheba-bee: I concur. I must ask, though, why Naomi continues to write this if she never does anything in it.  
  
Naomi: I get a laugh out of it. Kudos for me!  
  
Felix-frog: Goodnight everybody! 


End file.
